So four weeks ago I was at 257, it was exciting. Then I gained 6 lbs and have taken the last 4 weeks to loose it again. As I have mentioned it before I really haven't been trying. I know I need to exercise but I just can't get up and do it. I have been eating mostly healthy because that is what I am used to know but I keep eating out and then eating too much at night. I have really tried to stop and think about it and last week I realized that I am scared of 250. Here I am at 257 and I seem to be sabotaging myself. I think I mentioned it before but I have pulled out some old pants I used to fit into. Well the last time I fit into them was back in high school. I keep trying to tell myself "no it hasn't been that long" but I know that it is true. And I think that is why it is all so scary.
I can make the statement that I have lost 60lbs in a year but it doesn't seem that big to me for some reason. Lately I have had a lot people compliment how I good I look and I am always shocked. I still feel so BIG! I feel like I have forever to go but in reality I haven't been this small in almost 10 years. That is a huge accomplishment. But it is scary, I have always dreamed about being smaller. I have used my weight as an excuse for things that in reality I was totally scared of. And boys, ok I am 28 now so men. I am so not going there right now. :)
My brother called it a plateau and I guess it is. Not a physical plateau but a mental one. I know I need to push past it. Get down into the 240's and never go back. I need to stop thinking so big and just think about this minute. What can do now to get me to that goal. No starting tomorrow and instead starting right now. So hopefully I will have better results next week. I hope that I can keep this week's pound off and keep heading toward healthy!
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