Today. (Heavy breath out.) I made through. I did not wake up and help my friend. I totally suck, I hate myself for it. Well only a little since I know that she will forgive me for it. Instead I slept till 1 pm. I showered, ate cereal, and then spent probably two hours on Pinterest. I played a little Pocket Planes on my iphone and then off to church.
We had lots and lots of greeting and meeting people time today which multiple people asked me how I was doing and you know what, I was honest. "Not good." If they asked further I would explain how my hours were cut and that I have to do a job search now. This is good, it means people are praying for me. Saturday night sermon's are still about Revelations. Tonight we were on chapters 15 and 16 which list seven more plagues. As we have in the past we focused on the words that were spoken. One part that stuck with me was Rev 16: 4-7. The third bowl poured out which turned all rivers and springs to blood and the angel who poured it out said, "Righteous are You, who are and who were, O Holy One because You judged these things;...They deserve it." Then in response John hears the alter saying, "Yes, O Lord God, the Almighty, true and righteous are your judgments."
My pastor focused on this part, at least this is what most stuck out to me. He talked about how this judgement that would cause so much harm to the world the angel stopped to say that it was a righteous judgement. Then the alter (not sure who this is,) agrees that it is true and righteous judgement. How can something so painful be so true and just? My pastor referred to Daniel 9:24 that says that all iniquities will be brought to justice. All wrongs will be righted. He thinks that when we are in heaven we will understand everything and with that why everything in our lives had to happen the way it did. That the pain and suffering and things we just don't understand why God would let happen all has purpose. All is tied to his complete plan and that one day when we are standing before Him we will understand it all.
I have been focusing on the verse Jeremiah 29:11 - For I know the plans that I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for calamity to give you a future and a hope. So what my pastor was saying is something I know and have been reminding myself, that he has a plan. But hadn't put the other part with it, that God would show me why. Why I have suffered and gone through so much pain in my life. It also reminds me that I need to seek His reason for these changes at work. And that even if I don't know why He knows why and I have to trust Him.
I finished up the night at Denny's. I did my final for my critical reading class so it is done a week in advance. Which is awesome. I still have a few things to work on for my final project for my business management class but hope to have it done by Wednesday, not due till next Saturday. I did not look for a job today but I know that I need to.