Here I sit at the end of my day, it is 2:30am. I feel like it was just one more day in a long line of days. I accomplished things but nothing extraordinary. Though life is really like that. We live day to day. I think during Nano meeting daily accomplishments and celebrating with others as they accomplished goals, the days seemed extraordinary.
I cleaned the spare fridge this morning. Which I realized I never fully explained why I have whined so much about it. I don't really know how exactly it happened but it was like half gallon of ice cream exploded in the freezer leaving a huge mess all over it. Then, because it had been there so long, I had to actually get a scraping tool from the toolbox to get all the ice cream off the the freezer bottom. Bleh... I did clean it twice and even plugged it in to make sure it works. Dad is feeling congested so he may or may not come down tomorrow to help move it to the kitchen. I won't know till tomorrow evening. Either way it is ready to be moved.
I did some of my volunteer project while catching up on some tv from Hulu. The short version of what my volunteer project is, is that I stick stickers on papers for bone marrow donation. It is a dumb mundane job but somebody has to do it. So I figured why not do something while I sit around watching hours of tv every night.
Then shopping with my brother and sil. We went to JCPenny's and I managed to not spend $60 earmarked for food on a coat that looked totally cute but itched the back of my neck like crazy. So total success seeing that I am craving a jacket right now. I have decided that I am tired of getting by with my two thin sweaters since only have big bulky men's hoody sweatshirts that would be warmer. I really need a nice jacket but they are expensive of course. I will keep looking at deals and saving my penny's.
Tonight I babysat which was good. I love the kids I watched tonight, though one was trying my patients by the end of the night. Then I sat around reading for four hours after they went to bed. I love getting paid to read. It is pretty cool. Though two personal issues came up while babysitting. They are the same things you have heard about a million times so I will try to be brief.
1. I so want a boyfriend/husband. This guy came over to go out with them for dinner. I was totally checking out the guy and speculating about him. I was like school girl thinking about how when he came back, since they car pooled, that he would totally ask me out. It was dumb. I hate it when I start thinking like a teenager again. "OMG. I wonder if he has a girlfriend?" Because really it doesn't help. I get all nervous and instead of being myself I get all quiet and shy. Annoying.
2. The father was making small chat with me while his wife got ready and they waited for their friend to show up. He asked the common question, "Are you going anywhere for the holiday's?" To which I reply, "No I am staying here." He then asks, "Didn't your sister just move to a different state?" And I want to reply with a "Yes but I can't afford the $300 to fly out." But I don't because he is my employer and I don't think it is actually appropriate. So i mutter something about. "Yes she did but I can't go this time." He replies with a, "Oh, are you working at the school?" Again it is my desire to just be honest, I can't afford it but I still don't feel it is what I should say. So I answer about school and make a joke about how I am working for him watching kids at the holiday party they have on the 23rd, so I can't leave. And the conversation changes.
Then all night long I keep wishing they would just offer to pay for the trip for me. I know they work hard for their money but I also know I have seen them drop more $300 on the silliest things. Later this evening, after I got home. I thought how cool if they did offer. And then I thought I should go try a lottery ticket, people win a few hundred dollars from those all the time. But of course from there my head went right where it should have gone in the first place. If God wanted me to have the money to go then I would have it. I have seen money flow in and out of my life enough to know that with a snap of his fingers God could provide me the money. And because He hasn't I accept it. It is nice to dream but at the end of the day I choose God's path for my life. At the end of the day, even if the guy asked me out I would have to ask if he believed in God or not. Because as much as i want a date it is only the man God chooses for me that I want to date.
Another one of those lessons that have to be learned over and over again because it is so quickly forgotten.